Dating Game Who’s Who: In 1978 serial killer Rodney Alcala competed and won the Dating Game just months before a vicious crime spree. Yikes!
Sure pays to be cautious and do some investigating to make wise choices in dating so you don’t find yourself in a dangerous and/or compromising position.
After you have all your personal ducks in a row as discussed in Parts I-IV, you are now ready to create your customized template to find a mate. All you need is an 8×11 inch sheet of paper. If you are the journaling type a notebook will help if you want to record more detail. You can also construct your graph on a computer if you like.
This method helped me tremendously. I attended a class for singles called Wise Choices taught by Lynne Babbitt, a local Christian Psychotherapist. (lynnebabbitt.com) She instructed us to create these graphs to evaluate healthy matches.
To start, divide the sheet whether paper or electronic into 8 equal spaces. Now label each square with the most important categories you want in a mate. Here are a few category examples for your consideration:
Now pick only 8 of these or some of your own. Take each category and break it down into 6 specific things you are looking for in a potential mate within that particular category.
Here is an example of the specific breakdown of the Emotional category:
And an example of the Character category:
For each of the eight main categories, you formulate six specific things within that category you desire most in a mate. You should end up with 48 different attributes to evaluate for each person you meet.
When you finish your custom graph make about 10 copies to start out and begin evaluating any person you already know with whom you are considering a relationship. After that anyone new you are considering should also be evaluated on their own separate graph. The scoring system is as follows;
2 points for the high score
1 point for so so score
0 points for non-existent score
Add up the scores in each of the eight categories. Then add those 8 scores together. The highest cumulative score anyone can receive is 96 because no one is a perfect 100.
If a prospective candidate scores less than 80 on your graph, don’t allow yourself to become involved with them. This person is not who you really want. It will be an unhealthy and unhappy relationship that is wasting your valuable time.
Some candidates will need to be evaluated over time since you won’t know them well enough to rate them when you first meet. Use your judgement and take your time in this process, it is worth the extra time and effort. Love at first sight is a myth, don’t fall for it.
Feelings alone cannot be trusted. This rating system will help you use your head and your heart to make wiser choices in relationships. Choosing a marriage partner is one of the most important decisions of life and this system helped me immensely . I hope it works the same for you!
Shine on. . .